Penis. OK, there. We addressed the elephant in the room while simultaneously giving you a passive disclaimer that this article is not for the squeamish. If that anatomically correct word makes you cringe, you may want to read something like this instead. However, if you’re still reading… well, get ready to be delighted and possibly enlightened with all of the dirty deets on the show that has the whole Strip buzzing: “Puppetry of the Penis.”
Yes, this unique member revue is exactly what it sounds like. Tucked away (pun accidental but awesome) in the showroom at the Erotic Heritage Museum, two ballsy… ahem…. brave men, Rich and Fitchy, strip down to nothing but their tennis shoes (clearly they aren’t trying to compete with the Chippendales) to amuse the general public with balloon-animal-origami-esque tricks that only a Johnson is capable of.
You may be thinking that watching two grown men play with their wiener schnitzel for 90 minutes with 200 strangers sounds unwaveringly awkward but not to worry, it’s surprisingly funny. Really funny. Not only is the mood well-lubricated from the start thanks to the hysterical opening comedian, Kristeen Von Hagen (and obviously some stiff pre-penis-show drinks), the two penis puppeteers, quickly make the audience feel at ease.
“Welcome lovers of genitalia!” Fitchy shouts as Rich joins him on stage. The two caped men introduced themselves while the stage camera flickers on in preparation to project raw footage of their peckers onto the movie screen backdrop… Yes, bigger is better in this instance.
Without further ado, the men disrobe in superhero fashion presenting their well-tailored birthday suits in all their glory. Capes on the floor and family jewels exposed to the elements, Ritch and Fitchy engage in a little something they call “genital zumba,” which is key in dismissing the inevitable shock factor that briefly hovers among the crowd. Somewhere between the flopping and flapping of their freed Ps, the audience’s askew expressions morph into laughter and the tone of the show is set.
Jumping right into it, these two rather fit men turn their backs to the audience and the tugging, wrapping, twisting and tucking commences. Applying early learned creativity to their nether regions, the two begin taking turns participating in what we like to call frankfurter folding folly.
“I very much so enjoy the scrotum tricks,” Austrailian-born puppeteer Fitchy told us. “I like doing ‘The Windsurfer,’ ‘The Pleican’ and one of my favorites is ‘The Other Woman.’ I very much like being able to do that because that’s early on in the show and it shocks people and they are like, ‘Ohmigod. What is that? Where is that? Where has the rest of it gone?’”
Launching right into member masterpieces such as the aforementioned, with formations including “The Kardashian,” “E.T.,” “The Eiffel Tower,” “The Baby Bird” and our favorite, “The Didgeridoo,” Rich and Fitchy have no trouble showcasing their malleable manhood. And with the audience’s approving laughter, these two puppeteers prove in no time that they have not only mastered the trade of pecker play, but they have also managed to make it minimally awkward by way of comedy.
Most popularly known for “The Hamburger,” Rich and Fitchy invite the audience to take out their cameras, capture their junk food (sorry, we had to) on their phones and share it with their friends and family… because nothing says “Hi, Mom!” like a D pic. And if that wasn’t enough, he also invites any brave audience members, to try it on stage with them but of the men in the audience with us, no one was brave enough this time around.
However, that’s not where the audience involvement ends. If you are sitting in the first three rows, prepare for the possibility to go on stage. All we are going to tell you is that it’s hilarious and you will get a Polaroid for your participation.
“To do this show, you literally just have to go for it,” Rich says. “You just have to be willing to be naked and to be yourself and it’s OK to be silly and funny and naked. You can’t half-a** a show like this. You have to just jump in and go for it.”
Ladies and gentlemen, since you are reading this, we are betting that you are the adventurous type. If you are looking for a hilarious and unique experience, check out “Puppetry of the Penis” for a night out unlike any other….well, until you buy their book and try these tricks at home.
- Sit in the first three rows for optimal viewing
- Drink a bevvy or four before you go
- Bring your camera
- Leave your judgment at home
- Buy the book